Delhi Rape: What the government taught us- 5 lessons for budding politicians

This lecture is for the budding politicians and maybe police officers on how to be an Indian Bureaucrat

Be Moronic:

Nothing is more important than this. When the heinous crime of rape caught the attention of people and they revolted , not against the government , not against the system but against this crime,  our very own politicians and people in power reacted in the most moronic and idiotic way possible.

Any logical and sane person would see that people were on the streets because they were disgusted, they were worried and yes they were scared for their safety. No they did not come out to kill someone , they came out to express their anger and maybe see who all cared and maybe see what can be done. No people may not understand the complexities of law  and the best way to solve this crime but that’s why they appointed a government.A “leader”( as the politicians claim themselves to be) should have joined them not run away,but in India it’s different.  So remember this “be a moron” and remember “people are your enemies”

Be scared of people you represent:

Yes ,remember people who elected you want to KILL you. They like lawlessness and they just want to see you die. So anytime more than 5 people want to meet you or meet anywhere in the country, make sure they are stomped out. Just see what Delhi government did  when people wanted to do peaceful  protests–They shut down the metro stations, they put everything on high alert and when nothing worked, lathis and water cannons were brought out on those same people who gave you the power to use them. Don’t you forget this, once elected you are the local goon and everything else is irrelevant

Honor is given based on political mileage:

Remember that constable who died on the line of duty, who died saving an imaginary threat to politicians, who died because police thought peaceful protesters were a bigger threats than rapists in the society and even the parliament and basically who died for no reason. The amount of respect that has to be doled out has to be proportional to the political mileage that you can extract out of his death. All respects to him but when was the last time a ceremony of a constable was telecast on all news channels and attended by almost all biggies ? Was it really to honor him or to dishonor his services?. So budding politicians remember this ” a death of a martyr who died on the line of duty has to be exploited for your political  gains”

Express grief:

Make sure you have a standard template of expressing grief,”we condemn the attack and something must be done and uniting the nation kind of thing” . The keyword here is express .Make sure you stop at that

Solutions? No way:

Come on, you propose solutions when you see a problem, as you must have guessed till now, it never is your problem. You are safe and sound behind the z level security provided to you by the money of hapless victims and those : in the words of “Abhijit Mukherjee(yes he is the President’s son): dented painted women”. So why should you care, you care only when you feel threatened for eg by peaceful protesters carrying candles not rods

In the end: Just remember, anything that happens to the hapless people who did the mistake of voting you to power is not your fault. Until you have bread on your imported Italian table and served on a gold plated plate you are good. You go on living your simple life , why should you care, it was not your daughter